Words Woman Use

[LittleCasino]

Words Women Use:

1.) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five Minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5.) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing (refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing).

6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you - do not question or faint. Just say you're welcome.

8.) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying DAMN YOU!

9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.


This will later result in a man asking, "what's wrong." For the woman's response, refer to # 3.

[jimi4290]

what about...Forget it, which means she is really wrong, however the argument is over and all parties asume she was right.

and my wifes personal favorite NO. this simply means your a perverted jerk, leave me alone find somewhere else to go and do it yourself.

[Joe Wiz]

I've stepped on and tip-toed around those mines...... they're all true. One other thing....a woman gets the LAST word in every arguement. Anything a man says after that is the first word in the NEXT arguement.

[FLOATSUM]

When I get in "trouble" with the wife I found that the old saying, "life was a bitch, then I married one!" rules.
What this does is piss her off to the point where she wont talk (a real blessing at times). While admittedly it could lead to a "no nuckie decade", she'll at least shut up so I can get a good night's sleep.

Also after being married (to the same ole') for over 30 years, the best method of ending an argument is "oral sex". Simply put, as she's heading to the bedroom she'll say, "F-U!",,,, and on my way to the couch I reply "4Q2!" Then we're both satisfied and exhausted and go to sleep.

True "story".

PS; This all started on my honey moon when my dad (a real woman's man) decided to indulge the facts of life upon my soul. Anyways, knowing my dad to be a pure genious when it came to the opposite sex, I followed his instructions.
As we were undressing on the night of the honeymoon I removed my pants and tossed them to the new wife and said, "Put these on!" She did and of course they fell. She declaired with a puzzled look, " They're too big and I can't wear them."
Thinking case closed, I said, "Remember that! I wear the pants in this family."
Well she sat on the bed for a moment, thought about it (knew I had her now!) when all of a sudden she takes her panties off and tosses them at me (yahoo!). But then she says, "put them on!"
Okay, try as I did, I had to admitt and said, "I can't get into them, they're too small!"
That's when I found out what I had married when she daclared, "Damned right! and your not going to until you change your attitude!" (been paying ever since!)

[LittleCasino]

ROFL!! Floatsum, Great story!

[LittleCasino]

Originally Posted by FLOATSUM

True "story".

PS; This all started on my honey moon when my dad (a real woman's man) decided to indulge the facts of life upon my soul. Anyways, knowing my dad to be a pure genious when it came to the opposite sex, I followed his instructions.
As we were undressing on the night of the honeymoon I removed my pants and tossed them to the new wife and said, "Put these on!" She did and of course they fell. She declaired with a puzzled look, " They're too big and I can't wear them."
Thinking case closed, I said, "Remember that! I wear the pants in this family."
Well she sat on the bed for a moment, thought about it (knew I had her now!) when all of a sudden she takes her panties off and tosses them at me (yahoo!). But then she says, "put them on!"
Okay, try as I did, I had to admitt and said, "I can't get into them, they're too small!"
That's when I found out what I had married when she daclared, "Damned right! and your not going to until you change your attitude!" (been paying ever since!)

ROFL!!!

[buttercups]

LOL! You are all very smart men